Body Swap
by Midori-chan
Summary: An insane fic about what would happen if all of the G-boys switched bodies for a day^__^. Definitely yaoi--sorry, Relena-fans. Warnings : 3x4, 1x2, language, yaoi, and mild violence to sirloin steaks. ^____^ Enjoy~!


Body Swap

Trowa slowly cracked open an eye and felt around the bed for his koi, Quatre.  He finally gave up searching blindly and opened his eyes to their full extent.  There was no Quatre, and... _this bed was NOT his bed._  Trowa smacked himself in the forehead, expecting to squish down his chocolate bangs, but none were to be found.  

"What the hell's going on?!?  Duo, if you cut off my bangs, I will kick your a--"  Trowa stopped in front of the mirror beside the bed, and in the mirror's reflection, a Chinese boy, half-naked, with ebony eyes stared back at him.  

"AAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!!!" Trowa shrieked, and pretty soon, four more screams harmonized with him from the other rooms.  

He ran into the main room, where everyone sat.  "What the hell is going on?!?" Trowa demanded again, feeling the short ponytail in the back of his head.  "I don't know!  You tell me!" a skinny boy wearing jade boxers stepped up to him, brushing his bangs behind his ear in an odd fashion.  

"Wait a minute...you're Trowa?  I'm Trowa!" Trowa cried in indignation as he tossed his black hair around.  "I'm Quatre," the Trowa insisted, looking confusedly at Trowa.  

"So...does this mean we've switched bodies, because I sure as hell do not want to ever want to wake up to _his_ face ever again!" Wufei, who was apparently in the body of Duo, screamed, pointing a shaky finger towards 'Heero.' 

 "Oi, yourself!  What was I supposed to do, waking up to a spitting image, devastatingly handsome, you know, of myself, Wu-man?"  'Heero' retorted, placing his hands on his hips: a normal Duo stance. 

 "Let me get this straight: Duo is me, Wufei is Duo, Trowa is Wufei, you're Trowa, and _I'm_ you??" 'Quatre,' who seemed to be Heero now, snorted. 

 "Hai," Quatre agreed as he smiled up at Trowa.  

"Ack!  No way am I wearing this!" Heero snarled, looking down at his pink silken boxers.  He eyed Duo carefully, who was running his hand seductively down his left thigh.  

"Oooohh...how do you fix into these sexy pants, Heero?  They're skin-tight!  _You_ sure aim to please," Duo whispered, admiring the curve of his own buttocks. 

 "Oi!  That's my ass!  Leave it alone!" Heero protested in Quatre's body, flushing pink. 

"Ha, for once Heero, I can have your ass, and it's all MINE!" Duo shook his butt at Heero tauntingly.  Heero looked at a loss of words, holding up a finger in protest.  Suddenly, he grabbed Duo's (and his) butt and pulled him onto the floor, snarling.  Trowa, Quatre, and Wufei all sweatdropped. 

 "Gee, I never really could see myself all over the Perfect Soldier..." Quatre murmured, watching Duo and Heero kissing.  He blushed furiously, and put a hand on Trowa's shoulder.

 "All right!  The first thing that goes is Maxwell's braid!" Wufei shouted as he grabbed a pair of scissors.  

Duo recoiled from the kiss and grabbed Wufei with one of his muscular arms.  Wufei yelped and dropped the scissors he was holding to his braid as violet met cobalt blue.  

"Damn!  I never thought I'd be telling myself not to cut off my braid...but Wufei...if you _ever_ do so much as touch a sharp object...I promise you...I will dye Trowa's hair while he's in his sleep, and once we get switched back, you'll be known as 'the fruity-colors Gundam pilot,'" Duo promised him. 

 Wufei gulped and slid the scissors under a rug using his slender foot.  "Now, if you're gonna play me, Wufei, here's one piece of advice I'll give you...if anyone says something that makes you feel uncomfortable or you don't like, say 'Go to Hell.'  Believe me, it's what Shinigami says," Duo told him.  "If you're me, Wufei...live a little, please!  And don't worship Nataku today!" Duo begged. 

 "All right," Wufei agreed, fearing Duo still might creep up in the night and dye his beautiful black hair like a rainbow.  "Yeah, Heero...my men won't understand if I come in the body of Trowa...and I have a tea time with my family.  _Try_ to behave," Quatre sighed as he stared at Heero fidgeting in his silk pink boxers. 

"Right!  Quatre, I have to visit Catherine this afternoon.  Can you go in my place?"  Trowa asked, feeling extremely awkward being shorter than his koi.  "Hai!  I can handle it!" Quatre chirped happily.  Trowa smiled slightly and lightly kissed Quatre on the cheek.  "Ugh!  Barton!  Stop kissing me!" Wufei shouted in disgust, pointing at Quatre in Trowa's body and Trowa in his body.  

"You _know_ I have some guidelines for you, too.  I teach a karate class...God, this is embarrassing...just act normal!" Wufei instructed him.  

"Duo, just do what you think I'd do, and for Heaven's sake, STOP FEELING MY ASS!" Heero protested, watching Duo, once again, marvel at the curve of spandex.  

"Heero...you'll have to dress in my clothes... they're in the bottom drawer of the dresser," Quatre told him.  "Pink is not my color," Heero growled, heading to his room for some spandex.  

"Yeah, well, it's my color!  And if we really want to make people think we're normal, we have to wear everyone else's clothes!" Quatre yelled, his face flushed with both embarrassment and rage.

Twenty minutes and a bunch of curse words later, everyone came out wearing one another's clothing, but Duo's spandex had something seriously wrong.  "Geez!  I didn't know the Perfect Soldier didn't wear underwear!  Stop looking at me like that!" Duo screamed, running back into Heero's room.

  Five minutes later, he came back, looking normal, except that he was blushing.  "H-Heero?  how the hell do you get spandex off without tearing it?" he inquired timidly, his face growing as red as a beet.

  "You ripped my spandex?!?  Now you're going to pay for it, buddy!" Heero yelled as he playfully tackled Duo and kissed him.  "Okay...stop...STOP YOU GUYS!  I mean, it's okay for Duo and Heero to kiss, but the subliminal effect of me kissing Heero...is disturbing," Quatre protested, pulling Heero's black ribbon into its normal place.  

"Okay, Winner...then you can't kiss Barton!  The sheer thought of me kissing a Latin clown makes chills run up my spine!" Wufei snarled, curving his lip upwards.  

Trowa disregarded him and smirked.  

"Okay," he agreed.  "Hey!  Wu-man!  We're going to go out on the town!  I'll show you how to have a good time!" Duo cried as he slung an arm over Wufei.  Wufei snorted, but walked out of the house with Duo anyway.  

"Well, I have to go...Wufei's karate class should be starting soon," Trowa sighed.  He gazed around to make sure Wufei wasn't watching, and kissed Quatre softly.  "Wish me luck," he breathed.  "Good Luck," Quatre whispered, and Trowa trudged out of the house.  

Heero raised an eyebrow.  "Well, Heero...you don't have to leave the house until maybe...mid-morning...what time is it?" Quatre asked.  

"12:43," Heero replied stoically.  

"Ah!  I promised my family I'd be there by one o' clock!  Hurry, Heero!  Go!" Quatre urged, pushing the struggling Arabic out of the door.  

"Well, I suppose I'll go to the circus...to meet up with Catherine," Quatre said to himself as he walked out of the door.

***

"Oi!  Wu-man!  Let's go here for breakfast!  I'm starved, aren't you?" Duo cheerfully said.  "You know your voice doesn't fit Yuy's body," Wufei remarked, looking at 'Heero', who was grinning like it was Christmas day.  

"Yeah, well, you never see me rattling on about justice," Duo retorted, attempting to flip his braid behind his shoulders, but his fingers only caught air as he remembered that Heero didn't have a braid.

  Wufei pulled up to a drive-through window.  "Konnichiwa, this is Mc Donald's, how may I help you?" the box spoke, startling Wufei.  

"GO TO HELL!" he screamed defiantly at the box, shaking his finger.  "JUSTICE WILL PREVAIL!"  Duo clapped a hand over Wufei's mouth.  

"God, you have no life, Wu-man!  Here's how you order," Duo sighed, as he leaned over from the driver's seat.  "I'd like two Egg McMuffins with two coffees," he told the box, and, miraculously, the box answered back.  "Okay!  Drive up to the first window!  Arigatou!" it said, and then its voice died and it stopped speaking. 

 "YOU KILLED THE BOX, DIDN'T YOU, MAXWELL?!?  WHAT'S EGG MCMUFFIN A CODE FOR?!?  WHATEVER SORT OF SECRET ORGANIZATION YOU BELONG TO, YOU DIDN'T HAVE TO GET THE BOX INVOLVED!" Wufei shouted madly. 

 "Damare, Wufei," Duo growled, shoving his braid into Wufei's mouth and silencing him.  He drove up to the window, leaning over to the steering wheel over Wufei's lap. 

 "Here you go.." a man said, handing them a small bag, while Duo handed him some money. 

 "Keep the change," Duo interrupted him and drove off. 

 "DROP IT, MAXWELL!  IT COULD BE A BOMB OR CONCEALED WEAPON!" Wufei shrieked, totally flipping out.  

"Ooo.  I'm going to beat you over the head with a breakfast sandwich!  In the egg is explosive gunpowder!  Or how about scalding you to death with this super-hot coffee?  It's payback time!  Muhahahaha!  Honestly, Wu-man, GET A LIFE!" Duo exclaimed, sarcasm spilling over the edges of his voice as he handed him a squished sandwich and a cup of coffee.  "It's not poisoned," Duo assured him, sipping the coffee and wolfing down the sandwich in one gulp.  

Wufei stared at him in disbelief.  "How do you do that, Maxwell?" he asked in awe.  Duo parked the car and got out while downing the rest of his coffee.  "Easy.  Just shove it in your mouth and chew...chew...chew...and then swallow," Duo said, tossing the sandwich wrapper and coffee cup into a nearby trashcan.  

Wufei smushed the whole thing into his mouth and swallowed.  Duo was shocked to see Wufei bending over, turning a pale blue.  Duo put his hands around Wufei and performed the Heimlich maneuver, turning the harmless sandwich into a dangerous, flying projectile covered with saliva.  It smacked into the wall of the Mc Donald's, sliding down the whitewashed wall.  

"I'm...not hungry anymore," Wufei panted, chugging down the rest of his coffee and discarding it.

  "Well, Wufei, we're near the mall, and we're near the gardens," Duo pointed out, gesturing to a large multiplex mall next to a peaceful garden.  

"I'll go to the gardens," Wufei told Duo.  "O.K, but make sure you don't catch my braid on any thorns or anything.  I'm going to the movies," Duo instructed.  "Meet'cha back here at four."

***

Heero drove placidly towards the Winner mansion as the sun rose higher in the sky.  

_Behave_, Quatre's voice rung in his head.  

No problem.  The indestructible Heero Yuy could handle anything. 

 Except tea. 

 Heero silently gagged himself.  "How the hell to do hold a teacup?  I know there's some fancy pants way of doing it," Heero muttered to himself, pulling in front of the Winner mansion and stepping out of the car.  Immediately, two servants came running to his side as Rashid opened the door.  

"Welcome, Master Quatre," he greeted Heero as he stepped onto the plush red carpet.  The softness of it amazed him.  

"Um, sorry I'm late," Heero apologized, but it came out as a slightly higher-pitched tone.  "Hai, well, sit down, Master Quatre, this is your house you know," Rashid laughed, offering a chair to Heero at the base of an extremely long table that could easily seat about one hundred.  

Heero took a seat, and, all of the sudden, twenty-nine blonde girls appeared from the corners of the room, along with about forty guys wearing fezzes and sat down.  Heero looked down nervously at his plate...

_It had about fifteen pairs of silverware_.  

Heero gulped as he was passed the teapot. 

 _Being Quatre is harder than it looks_, he thought, spilling the tea all over the pristine white tablecloth until finally hitting the teacup with shaking fingers.  

"Something wrong, little brother?" one of the girls asked, viewing Heero staring at the biscuits and tarts dubiously.  

"Do you have anything heavier?  Like a steak or something?  I didn't eat breakfast," Heero informed them, still eyeing the myriad of utensils fearfully. 

 "Master Quatre!  I thought you didn't like red meat!" one of the guys in the fezzes spoke up. 

 "I do now."  He grabbed the teacup. 

 "Pinky out," Rashid reminded him, showing how to do it as the biscuit-and-tart plate was taken away from him and replaced with a large steak surrounded by fresh vegetables.  Heero stuck out his finger awkwardly and gulped down the tea quickly.  This family was beginning to bug him, with all their manners and stuff...he gazed down at the steak, and his mouth promptly watered.  

He thought he was going to die. 

 "All this steak and I don't have to share it with the others!" he whispered happily to himself. 

 "Master Quatre, did you say something?" Rashid asked, leaning towards the embarrassed pilot in pink.  

"Iie," Heero answered, his spirits sinking as he stared at the many pieces of silverware. 

 _What should I do?!?  Which fork is which?  They all look like forks to me, but I don't want Quatre's family thinking I'm a total baka!_  Heero's mind raced. 

 He reached for a fork on the left side of his plate, all eyes on him.  

"That's the fork for a salad," they all chorused as Heero retracted his arm and tried again, this fork being right beside the other one.  

"Dessert," everyone at the table commented.  

Heero now could feel all of their eyes on him, each one burning into him like many pairs of hot knives.  His forehead beaded with sweat as he considered his next move.  

_Too much silverware, too much_… he thought, forks and spoons dancing around in front of his eyes.  He then stretched his hand out for the top fork.  

"That's for straining your tea!  Quatre?  You should know that," they all scolded him.  

Heero suddenly snapped.  He grabbed the steak knife and jammed it headlong into the center of the juicy steak.  

Heero waved it around in the air, spattering everyone with steak juice.  

"I DON'T GIVE A FUCK!  RRRRGGGHH!  I'M NOT QUATRE!!!" he screamed at the top of his lungs. 

 "Who are you then?" Rashid demanded, obviously perturbed at all the steak juice on his outfit.  Heero realized what he had just said, and in those few vital seconds, understood that his cover was totally blown and he'd better leave as soon as possible. 

 He pulled out the knife and pocketed the steak, the juice leaking through his khaki-colored pants and staining them as pink as his face was right now. 

 "I...I'm leaving," he stated, and jumped up, with quick agility, and sprinted back towards his car.  He sped off in a rush.  

_Oh, man, Quatre's going to kill you if he finds out what you did_, he thought, and took out the steak to begin gnawing on it.  

"Damn silverware," he grumbled between bites of the succulent meat.

***

Quatre stepped towards the circus tent hesitantly.  Catherine came running out and embraced him in a back-breaking hug. 

 "Trowaa!  How have you been?!" she bubbled, taking his hand and leading him into the tent. 

 "Fine," Quatre mumbled, trying to keep from saying too much or laughing.  

_How can Trowa contain himself like this?_ he pondered.  

"I have a surprise for you, Trowa!  I've been waiting to tell you since last Thursday!" she giggled, her feather in her hair twitching violently as she bobbed her head up and down. 

 Quatre raised an eyebrow. 

 "You're going to be performing tonight!  In front of a full house!  I know you had a special act lined up for tonight, but none of us know what it is, except you told us it involved lions, remember?" she gushed, grinning. 

 "Performance?  In front of a full audience?" Quatre squeaked, his body stiffening.  "Uh, I *cough* have a cold, *sniff*...gomen," Quatre lied, his muscles tightening. 

 "The show must go on," Catherine persisted as she pouted.  

"But I--"

"Nope.  No buts.  Get dressed!  This is going to be awesome!" she laughed, pushing Quatre into Trowa's dressing room. 

 Quatre felt a large lump form in his throat, and no amount of swallowing could get rid of it.  He felt like he was dressing up for his deathbed as he picked up a yellow-tinted clown costume with blue polka dots.  He gulped, undressing and sliding on the frilled costume.  His eyes turned towards Trowa's mirror, where he kept all his pictures.  There was a collection of pictures of him, and him with Trowa, and Catherine. 

Quatre smiled warmly, looking at the photos and turning away again to open the door.  He stepped out and Catherine gasped. 

 "Beautiful!  Now, shoes!"  

She put two shoes, large enough for an elephant's foot, on Quatre.  Sweat trickled down his cheeks as he paced around worriedly. 

 "Stage fright?  Don't worry!  You're moment of glory is coming soon!" Catherine assured him. 

 "That's what I'm afraid of," Quatre muttered under his breath. 

 "And now, for the event you've all been waiting for!  Trowa Barton will perform a death-defying act that even I don't know what he's going to do!  Trowaaa  Baaarton!" the ringmaster introduced Quatre in a booming voice.  

The crowd cheered as Catherine shoved Trowa into the ring.  Quatre's knees buckled, and he slunk over to the tightrope.  

"God, please save me!" he hissed to himself as he watched the lions below the taut tightrope, snapping their jaws and licking their lips.  

Quatre, trembling, stepped out onto the rope and took a step forward.  The rope wobbled violently, and Quatre let out a yelp.  He bent down and crawled to the middle, but lost his balance and fell to the floor below.  He slammed into the ground as the lions chased after him.  

"AHHH!" he cried, tears running down his face, and the crowd cheering and laughing, watching Quatre make ten rounds around the ring.  

Quatre fell down on the ground and the lions all pounced on him.  He let out a sigh as the lions licked his face.  The male leader took Quatre by the collar and dragged his carcass back to Catherine, who was giggling and clapping her hands.  

"Wow!  Trowa!  That was awesome!  I've never seen a person run that fast!"  Quatre groaned and raised his scuffed face upwards.  

"God, thank you, Trowa, for training those lions," he breathed as he flopped back down on the ground.

***

Trowa padded into the classroom, and all eyes were immediately on him.  "Wufei-sama!" they chorused.  Trowa rolled his eyes and took a seat at the front of the class.  

"Okay...um, we...first do....stretches," he mumbled, staring at his fingernails.  

"Wufei-sama!" they all yelled, and stretched into various yoga positions. 

 "I can't see how Wufei puts up with this shit," Trowa muttered under his breath.  "Um, do your exercises, or something," Trowa yawned.  "WUFEI-SAMA!" they all said to him.  

Hours went by, Trowa being continually asked dumb questions about stuff he didn't even know.  Suddenly, he spotted five shiny daggers mounted on the wall adjacent to him. 

 "Oo.  This could be _fun_," Trowa mused, taking the daggers off the wall and walking off into another room.  

One of the students looked up from his exercise, and noticed that his teacher was gone.  He got up while everyone wasn't looking, and stepped into a room.  To his surprise, he saw Wufei sitting on the floor, casually juggling five knives.  

"Wufei-sama!" he exclaimed.

  _Fwipang!_  

Trowa, startled by the sudden noise, sent a dagger straight for the student, which it landed right by his left ear.  

"WUFEI-SAMA!" he shrieked, and two more daggers securely fastened his loose pants to the wall.  

Trowa looked up, and unearthly glow twinkling in his eyes.  He casually tossed the two other daggers, pinning the student's shirt to the wall.  

"Wufei-sama!  You're insane!" he screamed, thinking that never in his life would he ever say such a thing to his mentor.  

Trowa didn't say anything for a moment or two, then spoke up.  

"Don't scare me like that.  It's damn irritating!  How can you deal with this?  Geez, what sort of baka takes _karate?!?_  I see why Wufei is such a tight-ass all the time now," Trowa whispered.  

"You're not Wufei-sama!!  What did you do to..." the boy started, but was quickly cut off by Trowa placing the dagger from his left ear to his throat.  

"One more word kid, and you're dead," Trowa growled dangerously. 

 One of the students, he noticed, had heard everything from the crack in the door, as it was standing ajar.  The student quickly dialed the number for the local insane asylum as Trowa chased after him with a dagger.  All of the sudden, five guys clad all in white came and grabbed Trowa by the arms.  

"LEMME GO!" he screamed, thrashing his legs around so as to kick a guy in the jaw, breaking it.  "Dammit!" he yelped as he held his jaw.  "AAAAARRRRGGGGHHHH!" Trowa gasped as the men bound him up and stuck his wiggling body into the white van.  "Dmn y--" he roared, but it only came out as a muffled yell because he was choking on a sock.  

"Gomen nasai," one of the guys apologized to the children, piling in with the rest of the guys and driving away to the asylum, Trowa screaming in the back.

***

Wufei walked around the gardens, occasionally sniffing a rose or two and thinking sadly about how Nataku would have enjoyed this. 

 His thoughts were dashed by a voice calling out, "Oi!  Duo!  Fancy seeing you here!"  A woman with purple hair walked up to him and gave him a quick kiss on the cheek.  

Wufei recoiled into the thorn bushes, and tried to run away, but his hair was stuck in the thorns.  "Shit!" he yelped, as Hilde stared at him.  

"Duo?  Are you feeling all right?  It's me, Hilde," she told him.  "Hilde?  Oh, _Hilde!_  I didn't recognize you," Wufei gasped, even though he knew nothing about this woman, he figured she must be one of Duo's ::ahem:: close friends.  

"Here, let me untangle your hair," she offered, unbounding it and helping Wufei up.  Wufei stared at his hair, which was hanging limply around him and smiled a little at Hilde.  "Arigatou," he spoke through clenched teeth.  "Yeah, let's sit and talk," she laughed, motioning towards a sunny rock.  

Wufei nodded, and sat down next to Hilde on the rock.  "You...look nice...with your hair undone," she whispered, as she took Wufei's hand in hers and leaned closer to him. 

 Wufei sweatdropped.  

"Right, onna, I mean...I mean...go to hell!  Iie!  Wait!  Iie!  I mean...I must go worship Nataku!  Uh, yeah...I mean...ummmmmmm....bye!" he stuttered, and ran off, his long hair trailing behind him.  

Hilde shifted nervously on the rock, apparently thinking Duo was going though some sort of traumatic stress.

***

Duo eyed the popcorn hungrily, then splurged and bought himself a large bucket.  All of the sudden, a voice rang out in the hall: the voice of doom.  

"HHHHHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEERRRRRRRRRRRRROOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!"

 Duo dropped his economy-sized popcorn all over the ground as Relena came sauntering up to him. 

 "Oh!  I finally found you, Heeeerooo!" she crooned, taking a step towards him.  

"Get the fuck away from me, bitch!" Duo shrieked, making everyone in the theater turn around and goggle at the sight of a girl in a miniskirt prodding a boy in spandex.  "STOP FOLLOWING ME AND DUO AROUND!" Duo yelled, grinning behind the serious face he was putting on. 

 "....But, Heero..." she protested as she clutched her white hands together. 

 "But, nothin'!  Just because you're a rich bitch doesn't mean you can stalk me around in that terrible pink limo!  Honestly!  GET A LIFE, ONNA!" 

 When Duo had finished his diatribe, Relena scrunched up her eyes.  "You will address me properly!" she ordered though her hands. 

 "Damn, you've got an attitude!  This is a fuckin' movie theater, for Heaven's sake!  Not a ballroom!  You wanna know the truth between me and Duo?!?  We're more than just friends!" Duo pointed out.  "....Heero...?  You're......gay?!?" she gasped.  

Duo threw his hands up in the air.  "Isn't it sooo obvious?" he mocked.  "NOOOOO!  YOU....CAN'T BE....A FAGGOT!  JUST CAN'T BE!  AHHHHHHHHHH!" she screamed, and ran out of the movie theater. 

 Duo suddenly noticed all the people staring at him.  

"Oi, you would too...wouldn't ya?!" he asked.  All the people shrugged and grinned.  I suppose they were all part of some 'I hate Relena fan club' or something, because, they all broke into applause and cheers.  

"AWESOME!" they all yelled, and slapped Duo on the back.  Duo blushed and ran outside to the car, where Wufei was waiting with unbound hair and a terrified look on his face.

***

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH!" Trowa yelled in the white padded room.  

"God, will that Wufei shut up?!?" the guard moaned.  "Boss, can't we do something about it?"  The boss nodded.  Give him a shot of morphine," he informed him.

After Catherine had the trembling Quatre dressed into his normal clothes and had given him a cup of coffee, she received a phone call.  When she hung up, she had a worried expression on her face.

  "Trowa?  Your friend, Wufei, just got brought into a mental institution." 

 Quatre's eyes widened.  "I must go," he whispered.  "Matte!  I'll go with you, then," Catherine suggested.  Quatre nodded, and drove off to the asylum.  

When he and Catherine came up to the asylum he went to the guard.  

"Oi!  You're Trowa, Trowa Barton!  My kid said you run pretty fast for a clown..." he was cut off by Quatre.  

"How long has Trow-I mean Wufei been in here?" he asked worriedly.  

The man shrugged.  

"About two hours since we gave him the morphine.  He's pretty quiet now."  

Quatre gasped.  "MORPHINE?!?" he screeched, and ran off down the hallway, searching for his koi.  He finally found the door and jerked it open, and saw Trowa sitting on the floor in Wufei's body, his damp hair covering his eyes.  

"Trowa?" he asked cautiously.  

Trowa lifted his head back and burst into a fit of giggles, his eyes rolled back in his head.  "Hee hee hee hee!" he laughed, rolling over on the floor, "C'mere, Quatre!"  He planted a wet kiss on Quatre's cheek.  

Quatre shook Trowa violently.  "Trowa!  Snap out of it!" he screamed. 

 The giggles subsided and Trowa's eyes rolled back to their normal place.  Trowa appeared weary and tired.  "Quat-re?" he groaned, flopping down on Quatre's lap.  "Trowa, I was so worried about you!" Quatre exclaimed, pulling his head up into a deep kiss.  Catherine watched, in confusion, as her younger brother bent down and passionately kissed his best friend. 

 "I didn't know they were _that_ good of friends," she muttered, still watching Quatre kissing Trowa.

  When Quatre stopped, he turned around and turned six shades of red when he saw Catherine.  He dragged Trowa's lax body out of the cell and muttered, "It's an ancient Chinese custom to...um..." 

 Catherine raised an eyebrow.  "Wow.  I wonder how that custom came about."  Quatre sweatdropped.  "No clue," he laughed nervously.  The Arabian picked up the banged pilot, and curtly thanked the guard.

"See to it he stays away from children...and there may be some side effects of the morphine..." the guard warned him. 

Quatre waved him away and laid Trowa in the back of the car. 

 "I have to go home, Catherine.  Take your car back to the circus.  Be careful," he whispered, and drove off.

***

Heero arrived at the house, the last bit of steak polished off and the sun setting low in the sky.  

He sighed as Quatre came in with Trowa in his arms.  

"What happened to him?" he asked, eyeing Trowa.  

"Ah, insane asylum incident," Quatre mumbled, laying Trowa down on the couch as Trowa started giggling madly again.  

Heero decided that now would definitely not be a good time to tell Quatre what he did.  Quatre flopped down on Trowa's chest, his head rising with every breath his koi took. 

 Duo and Wufei entered, Wufei with his hair down and Duo with a smug expression on his face.

  "I don't think we'll be hearing any more of Relena-sama anymore," he laughed to Heero.  

"Let's go to sleep," Quatre said.  "Heero, you're bunking with me..."

"Oi!  Wait!  I have to sleep in the same bed as Maxwell?" Wufei snorted. 

 "Not unless you want to wake up in the same bed as Trowa," Quatre interjected, giving him a cold stare. 

 In the morning, more screams erupted from the rooms.  "What the--" Duo squeaked, walking out of his room with Heero, both in their own bodies, but both a considerable seven years younger.  

Trowa walked out with Quatre, their clothes hanging off of them.  "I only have one thing to say..." Quatre sighed.

"Here we go again."

**~owari~**


End file.
